Love Is a Choice

Love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob” (Deuteronomy 30:20 NIV).


Too many people have bought into the myth that love is uncontrollable, that it’s something that just happens to us. In fact, even the language we use implies the uncontrollability of love. We say, “I fell in love,” as if love were some kind of a ditch. I’m walking along one day and—bam!—I fell in love. I couldn’t help myself.But here’s the truth: That’s not love. Love doesn’t just happen to you. Love is a choice, and it represents a commitment.

There’s no doubt that attraction is uncontrollable and arousal is uncontrollable. But attraction and arousal are not love. They can lead to love, but they are not love. Love is a choice.

You must choose to love God; he won’t force you to love him (Deuteronomy 30:20). You can thumb your nose at God and go a totally different way. You can destroy your life if you choose to do that. God still won’t force you to love him, because he knows love can’t be forced.

This same principle is true about your relationships: You can choose to love others, but God won’t force you to love anyone.


“Diving for feelings”

It is essential to talk to each other about your deepest thoughts and feelings.
The best boy friend that I have is my wife.
The best girl friend that I have is my husband (although he still struggles with the term “girl friend”).

The main trademark of a relationship between best friends is that they talk about absolutely everything and support each other. This is also the epicentre of a world-class marriage.

If this exchange has never or no longer takes place, it is important to find out as soon as possible why the source has dried up:
Has silence prevailed as a result of upbringing, character differences, as a means of punishment or out of laziness?
Then it is necessary to unblock the source and start the flow of words again.
An average couple takes only six minutes for a conversation with each other per day, out of the 1440 minutes available in a day. Let us raise the average! Average is something for numbers and has no place here!

Plan time daily to talk to your partner about whatever is on your mind. During this time let your partner partake in your deepest feelings.


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